24 July 2014
Imposter
6 July 2014
Reflective
back
in the laboratory
of my mind
I concoct solutions
to ubiquitous problems
the silken intrusion
and delicate rub
of afflictive memories
the cocks and cunts
of youthful infatuation
the fascination
of the flesh
meshed into pornographic
reference
forced into grotesque
and novel shapes
made to adopt
censored smiles
and null identity
but these subtle devices
imperfect in design
only breed new monsters
bittersweet and unkind
.
18 June 2014
Ideology
you believe what you want to believe but there’s no give in tablets of stone and no thought that fills your stomach there is no dumb eternal essence no spiritual spark that electrifies the synaptic gap we speak ourselves into being and our language articulates ideology we are the vassals of whatever ideology we call common sense there are prohibitions that control your actions and procedures to improve your ideology I have no beliefs to lay claim to and no faction lays claim to me I’m not alone there are millions like me free of the chains of ideology
.17 June 2014
Dead Man
15 June 2014
Pinocchio
“no-one fucks like that”
she said “unless they mean it”
I had given it
full expression
and I had meant it
in the heat of the moment with the fire in my loins but hers was not my
circus I treasured my
freedom and would not relinquish
it just because we were
good in bed
“what’s wrong?” “don’t you fancy me?” her eyes searched mine I averted shamefaced
my silence was evidence of my guilt I didn’t know what to
say the feeling just
wasn’t there well
that was my story and I stuck to it
that was the story I told and told over again until I forgot it was a lie it was a story of
innocence it was far from the
truth I have two glass eyes and a silver
tongue I can lie with the best and often do but most of the time I only deceive
myself with my selfish acts of
betrayal
23 May 2014
Dragons
for my head
Shug said
and gave me a wrap
for the pain
all fingers and foil
trembling slightly
I inhaled
the acrid smoke
burning lettuce
slipped easy
into grateful lungs
I was waiting
waiting on a wave
a cool dark one
to sweep me up
and lay me to rest
I smoked myself sick
but even that felt good
in fact everything
felt good
too good
and I saw that
a man could lose himself
chasing dragons
.
Only Dreaming
15 May 2014
No Angels
4 May 2014
Forbidden
Take a picture of this
We were holding hands
We had heavy heads
And happy hearts
We were stoned
In the regular variety
We rushed to the shore
The sea lapped at our feet
The wind tugged at our hair
We were immortal then
We were cleansed
Spotless as in infancy
The world had yet to find us
To bind us to convention
And condemn us - all three
For the love we shared
.
20 April 2014
Sixteen
16 April 2014
Missionaries
12 April 2014
Little White Lies
once I had two lovers
I know what you’re thinking
you’re either thinking lucky dog
or filthy rat
I think the latter is more accurate
I was definitely some form of rodent
nervous and fearful of discovery
scurrying through the dark
from house to house
and back again
.
both girls new about the other
but it was still an emotional minefield
so I used to lie to them
little white lies to smooth the way
little white lies to spare their feelings
I’d make up stories about my day
never mentioning one to the other
I’d tell stories about where I’d been
and what I’d done there
.
I had deceit down to a fine art
it got easier to lie as time went by
until it was second nature to me
that’s the thing about lies
they breed like rabbits
one lie begat another
until I was swimming in an ocean
of those little white lies
.
when I took all those lies
those little white lies
and put them all together
they made up one big black lie
my whole life had become a lie
it was hard to keep up with them
and they were discovered
one by one
in the end I lost both girls
because I was such a liar
and liars seldom prosper
.