through the eyes of love

 

is your heart a haunted house?    do you stalk these streets of shame?     here you are - without a friend       your memories choke your dreams       are you really all alone?     have others judged you harshly?     do you know what you’ve done wrong?       can you name the crimes that you committed to feed your twisted and selfish love?

I hate to kick a man when he’s down     but I might not get another chance       you are the victim of your own choices      so, what do you want to know?      or what do you want to hear?      yes, you may have gotten a raw deal      but the sun will come out tomorrow      and you shall be redeemed    blessed through  the eyes of love        it might be less than you hoped for       but it’s more than you deserve

crucified

 

some things cannot be gleaned from books       some things are learned in blood    anyway     the lights are going out now    and I’m pinioned to my cross     sweet mother of heaven       hear me in my time of need     let me cast one last spell     channel my pain into something beautiful       

I’ve nursed one disaster after another     and there are terrible confessions hidden behind my eyes      coz I bent myself outta shape      trying to satisfy the needs of others     now I require something for myself     don’t judge me    I’m not stoned     I’m just tired     fatigued by the extremities of being     I know I made a cunt of myself    but I didn’t mean to prick anyone  else   with this crown of thorns

collective insanity

 

collective insanity      that’s my diagnosis    the whole world is crazy       always has been     the central delusion     the illusion of difference     tells us we’re better than everyone else      coz we at least are innocent       we at least are loved     there’s no one else quite like us      we’re so fucking special    we have the ear of god

Delilah

 

I think about her still     and I grieve    she was never truly mine       but even lies are sacred to lovers     me, I'd never exiled anyone before     they usually perished in accidents of trust     coz I don’t believe in much       but I still believe in love    everything happens for a reason       the truth will bear that out    I can’t see that she’s to blame though      I played it like a chump

food for thought

 

they say god has no religion

so, he does not pray

you see, faith is a killer

take that away and…

hell no, that’s not for me

I have a light burning inside

chalk it up to ignorance

or perhaps self-deception

but I’m not alone

while my candle is lit

going down it’s hard as hell

coming up  …it’s sudden vertigo

and you?       do you still have empathy?

lord, save our souls

we’re going down

into the ground

protect us from doubt

leave us numb

no room to maneuver

no food for thought

naked and alone

 

sleep will not touch me now     neither will I dream     it’s not my conscience again      it’s not what it might seem         they say there are no bad men      only bad situations          and I’ve lived through situations     maybe I brought them on myself     tell me, what difference does it make?      we suffer just the same    from things we haven’t done      everybody’s innocent     according to their tales     we are all just victims of circumstance    wrestling ghostly shadows     naked and alone

 

gagged

 

they locked me up       for speaking my mind        because truth is violence    in their insane world       I was drunk on freedom        and the license it gave me      but to think too deeply    is to dig your own grave       I was drunk on freedom      but I overreached   now I’m the odd man out      in a party of strangers        queer bedfellows      both orphans and strays      in this menagerie      of singular outsiders    I found a voice    to unlock their secrets       yes, I found a voice       but it was not my own

lice

 

same old     same old     here I am,  back in the dock again      I guess it’s too late now to plead insanity         so what’s my excuse?     I’m picking at old wounds     might even tear me a few new ones      but I can’t help myself      some memories have sharp edges      and weigh heavy on the heart    there’s pain at the core of everything      sometimes I can’t see it        but it’s always there         like worms gnawing on my bones     or lice crawling through my hair  

beasts

 

…and I shall fear no evil       even in the fury of the storm        for I have a place        yes, I have a place        a place I call home      nestled in my shoulder    in a world of secrets        where you could not touch me       though you were a beast      you could not touch me      yes, you were the beast      and I was alone

some random woman       a creature with no name       called me a narcissist      a narcissist?     I should be so lucky      what with my conscience     not to feel for others          but lord it up in some fantastic story        free of guilt     free of shame         yes, I should be so lucky       to be so deluded      to walk amongst the beasts       to think and feel like they do       to behave just like a killer     to carry on like you

dial my number

 

I got a telephone in my bosom      so I can call you from my heart       let me tell you about my freedom        coz it matters that much to me        and why don’t you take a look at yourself?      take a good look at yourself     is this the way you wanted it to be?      if I called collect    would you answer me then?    or if you chose to dial my number?     could it matter much to me?

flags

 

if this life had any meaning     we’d be the last to know     we’re spoon-fed on slurry culture      waving banners       and burning crosses      them outside      they’re not like us       we got the understanding      them outside ain’t got no culture      coz without a flag a man is nothing       without a flag he has no home

bullet to the soul

 

we are creatures of light and shade    but most of us are dead inside       victims of spiritual suicide      the abyss of our pain      swallows all ambition    and our darkest monuments      cast heavy shadows across our empty lives     I’m having a human experience here      typical to my generation     I took a bullet to the soul      I’m bleeding out again     but I no longer seem to care