being bad

it’s oh so good       being bad      to taste forbidden fruit    ripened on the vine       to cut from bed to bed        having a good time          it’s oh so good       being bad        so sad when it all goes wrong       love brings out the worst in us       but it was in there all along      

I’m the perfect devil        and troubles I have brewed    tell me how bad I’ve been     it makes me feel so good        everybody has a little bad in them       it’s always been the same      love can bring us ecstasy      and love can bring us shame

fondly

 did you count my steps as I walked away?        did you lock the door against my return?     take me back now to my former being       we can both cut loose      and have some fun     shed your light  on our dime store mystery       draw me a map of where I went wrong  

they say I was born with the dark charisma       that I honed that sucker into deadly charm       I carved the wounds that last forever     it’s hard to believe but I meant no harm       I raise my glass to former lovers and pray I’m fondly remembered by at least one

love the sinner

 I’m not really tired       but they say a rest is as good as a change     so, I’m off upstairs     where the stars might anoint my eyes     with a billion kisses     that hopefully sew my eyes shut     and send me happy dreams       I’m rolling over into tomorrow       when I might get some relief

I made a deal with god     at least, I think it was god     it was dark      and he didn’t speak     but I’m holding him to it      or I’ll cancel my subscription      my demands were quite reasonable      I need a little peace     I’m working on my memoir     the diary of a thief     in part a work of fiction     it outlines my beliefs

I’m not a holy roller      I don’t really believe in god      I don’t believe in little green men     or anything supernatural     but it’s part of my naïve charm     to believe preposterous things      I believe that words are magical      that music is sacred      that facts are often fictions     and fictions are as powerful as facts    I believe that love is the only agency      that can save humanity

I can love for no real reason      without knowing why     or when    or where     or if it is proper     or even appropriate       I could open up      as an ever blossoming flower     to love in my imagination     or with my flesh and bone     the universe conspires to bring me love     for there is madness in love     that’s why madmen make the best lovers

you have to love the sinner    even if you hate the sin      I have previous convictions    I have loved too much     and I have loved too little     I paid my debt to society     my heart’s been broken     I bled out for a bit     but I learned to love my enemies      and I’m prepared to loathe my friends    love can turn you inside out     there’s no room for caution with love     I’m ready to let it kill me      because everyone will take a piece     but some are worth the pain

crazy love

 so much for easy lovers      who will not heed the call      who measure out necessities       because they’re afraid to fall      I have loved  as others    yes   but I had crazy love     even when it seemed futile      I had the crazy love     and in the face of hate      I dished out crazy love      when I had the hard edge on       and my words were sharp as knives       I did not ration my feelings      I killed for crazy love     

something shines eternal

 is love a universal energy?    is it love that keeps us human?     some people know no love      they are human nonetheless      allegedly cast in the image of a long-dead god      a persistent schizophrenic       who pits us against ourselves     everybody’s been found wanting in his theatre of distraction    I know what I lack     and I don’t give a damn     

living on planet earth      in this 21^st century     has been a real kick in the teeth      I was all set up      for the socio-technical revolution       I was prepared to be blinded by science      but all I got was fake news     conspiracy theories     and the new fascist state    the world seems darker now    but something shines eternal      and it can’t be found in scriptures     folklore    or even those stars above     something shines eternal     and some have called it love

asphyxiation

 love is a mutt that follows you home       an overfriendly guest with a huge appetite      still, it’s your dime…       and it’s better than being alone…       isn’t it?      well, isn’t it?     or are you too tall for love?      too proud to stoop down low?    would you rather be a master than a slave?      well, love makes slaves of us all        some say love is life and indifference is death     surely it’s better to serve something      anything      than suffer that gradual asphyxiation?

dear reader

we are all of us mad     and acquainted with sorrow     and that being said       we’re maybe better for it      if that’s the natural order    and it seems to be   dear reader     we have suffered      we have suffered to our shame     I hope for your sake     that your greatest regret    in this season of regrets    was an affair of the heart     that’s where it counts      because that’s the best of us     that’s where we live      love and betrayal      it’s a fearsome thing     but the crimes we commit for love       are perhaps our saving grace       

love bomb # 5 (covid blue edit)

where is my vodka   and the nubiles that I ordered?    I need a filler for an empty bed   some-one to sooth me   and help me negotiate the lockdown    I don’t need love   or anything transcendental   just serve me sexuality    and make it a big slice    it’s been a lunar year    since I tasted something nice   back when I still had lovers   in a former paradise

I appreciate the science     but the science is killing me   I’ve been walking around in circles     in something of a daze    and I’m dying to reacquaint  you    with my secret ways    so why don’t you come over   clandestinely    and spend a couple of days

I’ve been waiting for a woman   who will not run and hide   to come to my amusement park      and take a forbidden ride    so say  you’ll come on over    later     when it gets dark   it’s a breach in regulations    but it could just be the spark    that detonates our love bomb    and gives us both a lark

sharks

she spoke red     it’s a very old trick    but it gets your attention     like a loaded gun      but whatever she said    I paid  no mind     it didn’t mean nothing     she was  just having fun      I’m the same     when it gets down to it     and it gets down to it     often enough

you have to dig deep    if you’re gonna crash out    but you got to stay sharp    when you slip your collar   you must forge your papers    and murder the past   we were both killers     honed to perfection    too well matched    to do no harm

they tell me baby sharks    eat their siblings    I know people     who are worse than that    they think they are special    because they feel no fear    that’s completely reflexive     but it sets them apart      I’ve  been bitten more than once      but she bit deepest       she could still take a piece        whenever she wants

hear the Creature EP

assassins

some tender moments remain uncharted   those rendezvous are covert affairs   instant hook-ups are of little consequence   cause if nobody knows then nobody cares   but beyond the cheap thrill and the base gratification    it’s still a charade    I was never really there

I severed those ties with definitive force   I cut them off and cast them out   then I set them on fire   powdered the ashes   and buried them deep   far far away   but they haunt me still    the flesh of my flesh   that lost appendage cleaved from the bone   a bloody sacrifice   to some lesser evil   they’re a revenant organ   or a phantom limb    they’re a forbidden exhumation and a filthy itch I long to scratch

 

those stones we so carelessly cast   birthed ripples of unforeseen dimensions    now there’s a tsunami of shit about to engulf you and I   and we shall reap more than we ever sowed   in yet another dismal harvest   of sorrow and despair

 

our practiced tongues wove convenient fictions from little grey lies   which we honed into truths sharp as knives   some kinds of love can smell like hate   some kinds of devotion feel like possession  

 

there are truths made of lies   like the stories told by jealous souls of bitter adoration   where romantic weapons are used with cooler calculation   yes  some kinds of love are poisoned daggers   wielded by lovers who are gentle assassins

 

 

Casanova

I’ve seen your data

you need sunshine

so come over here

to share in the light

and we’ll roll together

our limbs entwined

I have total control

over fleshy geometry

I can read the signs

that others can’t find

and I know the secrets

you keep confined

I’ll hold you tight

but love you looser

we’ll bump

slip and grind

into the future

and take our place

with those of our kind

I’ll be your pupil

you’ll be my tutor

tongues might wag

but we won’t mind

for true love is deaf

and lovers are blind

Déjà vu (Revisited)

was it animal waves

or the scent of blood

that baited the trap

that captured us?

we had ringside seats

but were with the gods

ours were edgy vices

those stolen moments

were crimes of passion

but you were seamless

in your auxiliary actions

I figured this was not

your fist time around

but had a queasy déjà vu

that vertigo of the libido

when you regurgitated

the standard disclaimers

and the magic was all gone

your words were so familiar

I could almost sing along

because I recalled the singer

who used to sing that song

Just Desserts

naked as a peach pip

stoned as a cherry

my strawberry tart

wet dream topping

knicker-dropper glory

your raspberry fool

scoffs passion’s

bitter berries

forbidden fruit

baked in a pie

that fleshy pulp

juice sticky fingers

hot love sundae

my just desserts

apple of my eye

Fantastic Tales

we were both

willing and able

with the usual caveats

in the conventional style

we hooked up

on the social network

where you first flashed

your rented smile

you told me

some orphan story

of routine betrayal

and stoic denial

you were the heroine

of every chapter

you told it so well

with no trace of guile

we were both fishing

for a little excitement

but I couldn’t commit

and you grew hostile

but I was enamoured

by your crooked geometry

and your fantastic tales

where fun for a while

.

Ocean

I dreamed you were the ocean

and you called out my name

you said that if I joined you

we could end this worldly pain

I dreamed I was a sea shell

with the ocean trapped inside

and I called back to you

I’d swim out with the tide

I dreamed I was a dolphin

swimming in the sea

and I could feel your love

for you were part of me

I dreamed I was drowning

but didn’t seem to mind

for I was just dissolving

as you and I combined

.

Ferrets

I thought I’d made a friend

I made more than a friend

I made a fucking enemy

I wish she’d pack her bags

And return to her ferret factory

I don’t need the hassle

Of an extra arsehole

It’s hard enough

Managing my own

She made a scene

But I really don’t mind

I could still have her any time

.

Holy Cow

the ritual of disclosure

that striptease of discovery

makes liars of us all

yet those forgeries of love

and softly spoken fables

soon become our sacred cows

Wrapped

And you were there with me
In the clouds and the rain
What does that signify
In the landscape of dreams?
Is it one of those things
Only lovers would know?
.

Sweet Nothings

In the post coital haze
when you’re fuzzy warm inside
Do you pour sweet nothings
into receptive ears?
What fragrant lies
escape your honeyed lips?
What sugar coated deceptions
slip between the sheets?
And in the morning light
do you cultivate a little distance?
Do you feign casual indifference
amidst stilted words and gestures?
Or do you simply simulate amnesia
with deliberate and practised poise?
.

Thief

I wasn’t fazed when she shied away from my touch. I expected that, top bird like her. She didn’t just jump into a situation like that – didn’t give her affections away to just anybody. Especially the likes of me. I was an imposter and I think we both knew that, but I guess I fulfilled some need in her. I made her smile and I wasn’t demanding her life. I just wanted a little of her time. 

Boys fall in love with girls like her and they never forget them. They carry their memory in some sacred place within. I could have loved her and perhaps I should have loved her. Summers fade and lilies fester, but nothing lingers like words left unspoken.

.