there’s a killer in my bed murderer of sleep he will not take his rest until he has slain all my dreams my own worst enemy stalks between my sheets darkness softens the edges of the world the universe expands my mind dilates too the day begins at midnight and I begin with it maybe I sleep when I’m not looking but I am looking now and I can’t sleep for thinking how many times have I written these words? how many ships have I knowingly scuppered? my oasis of calm is becoming a nightmare but I wander on enslaved by the night hold me close now bring me some comfort kiss both my eyes send me some sleep out in the dark there are people drowning their stars burn too bright to bring them any peace I’m pounding out words as if they were lifeboats god save our souls we’re in this too deep
14 October 2023
devils
I am you the
power of you I measured every cup of
you before I poured myself out too we are
both devils we each pack our own
hell we take pleasure in loathsome
things and wield our desire like clubs desire
is in the jurisdiction of devils and
desire is achingly cruel we were wounded by desire and desire has made us wicked our love was a cry in the void we bled willingly for it while it gave us strength but passion betrayed us and our love turned
to contempt we’re weakened now there’s a fatal flaw and our silence speaks of failure so we’ll settle our account with what remains in our hearts before we sever forever
12 October 2023
death song #2 (en sotto voce)
intone my death
song hear me out I want a real time extension coz my future’s in doubt I’ve got a one way ticket it’s the only way out there’s a few miles behind me from the womb to the cemetery every night every day I pray for mercy but time will tell there’s
no other way if my number is finally
up there’s surely time enough for one
last incantation our little voices singing low into eternity we flow
10 October 2023
sauce
how do you like this sauce? a vessel full of good intentions idiot notions and wholesome adult fun the distillation of orgasmic juices primed for psychosexual pay dirt you can smell it the fleshy expectation a jolt of adrenaline an electrical surge we are dynamite who cares why luxuriate here in opulent splendour I’ll roll us a stony and weave some more lies you and me baby we’re something special so let’s put this together before it gets lost
8 October 2023
dionysus
we are made of sundry pleasures stolen to quaff a lusty measure while we weep for
something more this world is more
than seductive it’s murderously addictive so sweet and delicious have we become we are killers of our sacred pleasures and everything is pleasure and
pure pleasure is insanity it’s the high
on high euphoric that salves the mind and
frees the soul you cannot buy such thrills you must pocket them with scheming hands and
a knowing touch
the sweetness of love lies in the sharing of pleasure but the sweetest pleasures are hardest
won for in
the midst of joy there is despair and at the heart of pleasure there is pain toil
and fatigue destroys people and pleasure
restores them without desire we have
no function without pleasure we are mere automatons so
let us all pleasures prove for we are
sorcerers and gods in these fleeting moments
and we must relish our pleasures before the spectre of boredom turns us back into straw
7 October 2023
troubled waters
death ebbs and flows with the tides and seasons my dreams are wont to do the same with drowning boys and bloated sailors unnatural deaths in troubled waters to dream of death is to die a little perhaps we all die as we dream in some private nightmare all on our own
6 October 2023
isolation
I fashioned
myself a tinfoil crown proof against
the inclemency of nature when gods
and sorcerers tamper with my head I
was trying to set things straight christ
knows I tried with razor blades and
sealing wax to peel back sixty years of insulation the features the faces the names stripped away to reveal the emptiness of self a million illusions consigned to memory
it’s half
past dead in the morning I’m pall
bearer to my dreams I feel it
closing in the certainty of loss but loss does not define me it simply reveals the true me I count my wounds instead of sheep every night is a little death my
isolation is a gift of the gods a test
of my endurance isolation is the currency of individuality the sacrifice of my social appendage in honour of a selfish heart
27 September 2023
ripened
most of the time I’m ageless but mirrors tell no lies I’m too old now to plead innocence and too young to know much at all I have not grown wise I’ve just become careful I remember the follies of youth the sap still rises in my veins but I’m kinder now and more patient though I’m none the wiser for all the books I’ve devoured the lips I’ve kissed and the secrets I’ve hidden behind my eyes
I look upon the past as if it were a dream and what a dream it was that steadied me for the certainty of
death is there dust on my wings? I have not forgotten how to fly but fly to where? surely not back into the comfort of old
memories but forward where the days pass too swiftly to count will I be surprised by my maker as I
round the next corner? or shall I
simply fade away into the oceans of time?
I don’t screw with my neighbour or take what isn’t mine I know the edicts of heaven and I keep an ear to the ground I believe the world still talks to
me but as an infant because I’m not a dead child I’m a grown one my mind still burns with delirious ambition though I am mocked by the passing
years but this is not a lament for
the dying there are no tears in my
eyes for I have savoured life and I’ll leave it without regret
24 September 2023
power
sex is power your sex your power take it shape it break it sex is power as money is power and violence is power the object of power is power and power corrupts all the way but any human power can be defied because beauty is power kindness is power love is power and your words have power so measure them carefully we kill gods with the weight of our words and anoint new ones to bind us into place
art has
power become art make yourself your canvas resist the power that paints you
docile you’ve been educated designed controlled and objectified but you can break that power there’s nothing you desire that stands against nature you are an individual you are power a force exercised in belief thought
actions and words so
speak yourself free find the
language that brings you power
modify your way of being
become a tree of knowledge
amidst competing powers
21 September 2023
commerce
your jailors send their most convivial regards
they offer
you 10% off your next purchase
and to
ensure your complete cooperation
remind you
that they hold familial hostages
the wheels
of commerce turn more smoothly
when a
little coercion is applied
besides,
your credit rating could be effected
should you
fail to comply
it’s a game
of cat and mouse
and make no
mistake – you are the mouse
so go back
to the treadmill - you know the score
you’ll work
hard for your living
until you
can labour no more…
18 September 2023
bender
there are dark clouds brewing in my teacup and I’m ready for my bug juice god’s own brand liquid fire destroyer of men I’ll drag the low end later but right now I’m thirsty and it’s just my style to lose my composure go out on the razzle and drink myself sober I’ll get my jollies in a drunken stupor and who knows I might even get my leg over so c’mon let’s spill some liquor we’ll have ourselves a wicked old session raise your glass and loosen your tongue coz I feel a bender coming on
17 September 2023
bubbles
do you read me? do you feast your eyes on my sparkling inanities? are you ready? could you turn on at my behest? we’re on a journey you and I it won’t take long just lend me your imagination paint a picture of this I am encased in a lithium bubble perfectly serene and quite tame but the wild things beat on the membrane I hear them call my name my head is with the bubble but my heart is outside with them and where are you? are you out there with the wild things? or are you trapped in a bubble like mine?