I don’t know which way is up and which way is right some police officers from the zoological geometry division was asking me the square of the hippopotenuse but I kept shtum I ain’t as dumb as I look and I don’t look as dumb as I seem I just stared at their velcro macramé feet and acted all sweet and innocent like a cubic hyena in heat
I had shoes like em once I said
but they wouldn’t hang straight they beat me relentlessly they beat me thoroughly when they eventually left I knew I’d been beaten
cops don’t hand out beatings like that no more no pride
no professional pride in
their work I’m not complaining see and I ain’t going all nostalgic it’s just I hate to see declining standards
I lost my sense of up and down so I went to have my yo – yo adjusted the man said we don’t do that no more people use scatellite navigators I can’t afford no scatellite if everybody gets a scatellite they’ll blot out the sun! but we’ll know
where it is he explained we’ll
track it on scatellites
I
got a new string for my yo – yo but he said
I’d have to wind it myself they had declining standards
to maintain I no longer know which way is up and which way is right
my yo – yo pulls to the left or maybe it’s me standing a little to the right
I recently discovered that the hill outside my house had a sufficient incline to propel me to quite some speed, enough momentum in fact to crush small children. This is the only pleasure left to me in my old age, confined as I am to the wheelchair. There’s always some nice police officer who will help a distraught old man home, but not before I have collected my victims tears in a phial which I can drink later at my leisure, mmm - delicious.
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